First of All, Taco

I was sold on the idea approximately four seconds before Henry finished elaborating. Profuse elaboration was superfluous anyway- the stark simplicity was the plot’s most attractive selling point. I immediately resolved to hook up Google Voice, starry eyed with the possibilities it seemed to promise. It sounded like such a killer idea- leave myself voice mails whenever I get ideas, leave it to Google Voice to transcribe the contents of those messages and then compile the transcripts with library of random notes. Notebook paper = kept to a minimum.* Man, maybe I am slightly savvy after all!

Nope. Here’s the transcript of a voice mail Henry left me yesterday. Henry- not John, remember.

Voicemail from: (555) 555-5555** at 3:37 PM
Google Voice
Hi, this is john just go to follow up with you. Please check your schedule. Make sure you were available Thursday night, okay. Hello apprehend the. I think the machine I may or may not. And this may not. The able to help on Thursday night and so That’ll be just you and dignity dead. First of all taco and figure out what’s going on and then I don’t know what the best part greater detail so. If you give me a call back. I appreciate, or I’ll see if the tonight. The.

Obviously a premium cannot be placed on the comedic value of this particular message nor on its inspirational power- I hope to someday soon have a plaque on my desk with the entirety of this transcript, eternally pressing me on to persevere, and clearly I can use “That’ll Be Just You and Dignity Dead” as a song title sometime down the road. Equally obvious however is the fact that this just isn’t going to cut it as a shortcut to writing my own notes when epiphanies strike in real time, so it’s still a mixed bummer. But the bummer quotient is admittedly low.

Whoa! Another song title!

*That could represent a potential loss of old school legitimacy points, however… Hmmm. My hipster elite status could be compromised!
**To protect the innocent. And the not so innocent.


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